Understanding and managing emotions – both ours and others’ – is a big part of emotional intelligence. People who are emotionally smart can not only recognize and control their own emotions but also read and respond to the feelings of others effectively.
This skill is essential for successful interactions both in our personal lives and at work.
Wondering if your emotional intelligence could use some polishing? Watch out if you’re saying these seven things:
- “I’m not going to change. This is who I am.”
Flexibility and the ability to adapt are hallmarks of high emotional intelligence. Those who struggle in this area might resist change and prefer sticking to their ways. It’s good to have strong beliefs, but being open to new ideas and feedback is equally vital.
Instead, try saying: “I’ll consider your perspective. It’s important for me to be receptive to feedback, even when it’s challenging.”
- “I don’t care how you feel.”
Ignoring others’ feelings is a classic sign of lower emotional intelligence. Not showing empathy, especially in tough times, can hinder forming supportive and meaningful connections.
A better response would be: “I’m sorry you’re upset. What can I do to support you?”
- “It’s your fault I’m feeling this way.”
Those with higher emotional intelligence understand that they’re responsible for their own feelings, not external factors or people. Our emotions stem from our internal interpretation of situations, and they give us a chance to learn about ourselves and set appropriate boundaries.
Instead of blaming others, say: “I’m feeling emotional at the moment. My view of this situation is that…”
